Hunt for the Sexy Geeks

First, we saw the Sexiest Geek Alive contest. Now, Gamer.tv brings us the Sexiest Gamer contest. But while the Sexiest Geek contest kept it real by requiring a test of the Knowledge of Nerdly Matters of its participants, the Gamer.tv promotion merely asks you to list your top three favorite games.

Also, a major problem with the contest is that the gamers pictured are not in the least sexy to me! Okay, we all have different taste and all that, sure. And I *guess* I appreciate a nice washboard stomach as much as the next girl. But that's not what sexy is built on, for me. And for many geek girls. The most important thing for us, what turns us on, is Brain Power. We may indulge in a little kissing action with pretty boys, but they'll never go the distance. Instead we look for the tell-tale quirks of personality, the indie t-shirt, the limited-edition accessory that says, "I am a collector of the strange, an eccentric, I am a prize in a world of muddled Muggles." And of course a nice smile never hurts.

But the true test of a sexy geek's worthiness is in Making Stuff. Robots, art, decompilers, what have you - we go for guys who can design and build some cool and unexpected thing. That is HOT! Watching someone do what he's good at is a turn on that beats a Calvin Klein underwear model body.

I know, it's different, slightly, for boys. Boys tend to be more visual, at least initially. But I suspect that for many of you, hotness in a girl goes way beyond looks and goes into the realm of charm, sass, wit, and so on. We geeks are pretty particular that way I think, because most of us are smart ourselves, and we tend to get bored when under-stimulated.

If I were to ever have a sexiest something contest on GGA, applicants would have to submit questionnaires, projects, and an essay in their own words in addition to a photo. Not a bad idea! It could be fun. What say you, readers?

Comments

[Draigon]

Wait, you mean if I stood naked before you with an Xbox covering my naughty parts that wouldn't swoon you to your knees? Damn, all this time. Pfft. Please remove my picture, k thnx. (j/k, of course)

I agree with you on what defines sexy. Almost every time I ever actually get interested in a girl is when I find out she plays an instrument or can do really interesting artwork. Eye candy has never been enough for me to try to get anywhere with a girl.

I've never cared for "sexiest" lists, but then that's probably because I never topped them. My computer thinks I'm sexy. Yes, you do. *pats his monitor* Yes, you do.

[jane]

Ha! What really confuses me is who enters these things, and why? There's a sociological study to be done there...

[ClockworkGrue]

At least one of the girls was honest enough to say that MYST was her favorite game. Anybody pretending to be a gamer wouldn't pick a 10-year-old adventure game as their favorite.

Still, in my Sexiest Gamer contest, all beauty photos must be taken of a person while they are playing a game. If you can look good while all tensed up and staring, unblinking at a screen, only then do you deserve to be called "sexy gamer."

And the finalists must engage in a gaming tournament. A beauty contest where the finalists all engage in some sort of gladitorial arena battle sings of legitimacy. Oh yes.

[jane]

Ahh Clockwork do you think GGA could sponsor such a contest? That would be so SWEET. Hot dudes and chicks in a Battle Royale! Topless!

Oh my, the possibilities.

[waka]

I think this is an *excellent* idea.

In addition to regular physical stats (measurements, etc), I think players should have to provide their best clear time for their favorite games, etc.

waka

[Draigon]

hmm, I'd love to see a GGA sponsored contest. :) As long as it was more than just visual beauty. What's sexy between gamers?

Here's some ideas for not-so-obvious "sexy" criteria:

well-rounded gamer: fairly spread across genres.

time efficient gamer: Means they know how to get some gaming in those awkward moments when you're not doing anything. Such as a ride up the elevator or waiting for friends to show up to the movie.

creative gamer: this could mean a couple things. Maybe they write about games, create gaming t-shirt designs or gaming-related artwork. Could even be as simple as a dedicated Simulation player (building cities or families takes some creativity).

evangalistic gamer: the kind of gamer that likes to spread the word. Writes guides. Refers friends. The number one way gamers discover games is by word of mouth, so obviously we have quite a few evangalistic gamers. :)

cutting edge gamer?: hey, you deserve an award if you keep your computer upgraded & buy every single console just to play the latest games. I'm not even that good. :)

[Brain From Arous]

And for many geek girls. The most important thing for us, what turns us on, is Brain Power. We may indulge in a little kissing action with pretty boys, but they'll never go the distance. Instead we look for the tell-tale quirks of personality, the indie t-shirt, the limited-edition accessory that says, "I am a collector of the strange, an eccentric, I am a prize in a world of muddled Muggles."

Fair warning, Jane: a lot of guys have learned how to fake "alternativeness," just as they learned to fake "sensitivity" when that was the attribute of choice.

But I suspect that for many of you, hotness in a girl goes way beyond looks and goes into the realm of charm, sass, wit, and so on.

I think you suspect wrongly. While those things are crucial to a happy long-term relationship, the initial attraction is almost always physical for us.

[Bowler]

I'm game for a GGA sexiest geek contest. However, there's no way in h-e-double hockey sticks I'm going topless. Not even back when I was 19 and would have looked good doing so ;)

Are gaming professionals disqualified from the contest? Or should we have a pro and am contest?

[Matthew]

I feel that I need to bring up a counter-point to Brain's statements. Faking sensitivity and alternativeness is one thing, but I believe what Jane was getting at was a bit more in depth. Faking geek-ness (-hood? -dom? lacking a better term) in my opinion would be a daunting task. Most geeks tend to share a common skill to spawn spontaneous debates (ranting) usually over seemingly absurd and often unimportant matters. I see it in almost every day to day conversation between my friends and I. I belive that lacking true "geek" passions be it computers, video games, comics, et cetera this "skill" would be very hard to emulate in front of another geek.

As for the contest, I feel Jane is correct. Much more is needed than just a photo and a list of favorite games. Sexiness goes way beyond physical attraction (for both women and men) and definitely when it comes to the realm of geeks. I could see you hosting a more in depth contest with great success. You would probably see a very different set of entrants than Gamer.tv saw as well as a more passionate and opinionated set of voters.

That is just my observations though and could very well be wrong.

If there is a contest I'll make an effort to enter.

[girl_from_mars // EveOfDusk]

Very true Jane! I know for me, wit and intellect are requrements for winning the sexy label from me. I like the idea of actually screening the contestants before letting them enter your theoretical contest, although for all that work, u'd have to want to enter really badly ;)

Maybe you could have nominations as well - where other ppl nominate their gamer-geek friends. I bet there are a lot of SHY sexy geeks out there ;)

[defenestrati]

Take a look at the photos of the top "sexy gamers"... no one could put the time into preparing themselves for their public that these people obviously do on a daily basis, and still spend enough time gaming/thinking of gaming/associating with gamers to warrant an authentic "gamer" label. Dabblers at best.
Who are they trying to fool? Seriously, who?

[Bishop]

I have to disagree with Brain here on the physical attraction part. Like Jane says, the heart of attraction is in the geeky t-shirt, or the witty statement. Being a film and videogame nerd, I find that I am never turned on more than when a girl can talk with authority about my two loves. I am, in fact, not turned on by a girl in the least until I have some sort of idea that she could be a geek like me. Oh, and a GGA sexiest gamer with a test: this, is a good idea; never can meet, see, talk to, or even read enough about smart, sexy, geek girls.

[Andrew]

"Instead we look for the tell-tale quirks of personality, the indie t-shirt, the limited-edition accessory that says, 'I am a collector of the strange, an eccentric, I am a prize in a world of muddled Muggles.' And of course a nice smile never hurts.

But the true test of a sexy geek's worthiness is in Making Stuff. Robots, art, decompilers, what have you - we go for guys who can design and build some cool and unexpected thing. That is HOT!"

Is that really true? Is this really how a "geek girl" thinks? There mustn't be that many "geek girls" around where I live.

[jane]

"Is that really true? Is this really how a "geek girl" thinks? There mustn't be that many "geek girls" around where I live."

well, i grant you we're all different, of course - so i can't guarrantee that all geek girls feel this way. but based on my experience talking with tech-savvy and tech-interested women from all over, i would say this is *generally* the case.

we like boys who are *into* something, usually something scientific or creative; something that drives you to stay up until four in the morning building it, or painting it, or writing it. a passion for construction, for making the world a more efficient, more pleasant, more user-friendly, better place.

[momo]

Ahhhhh-indie "fashion". The true staple of the artistic "individualist".
maybe it's just me, maybe it's my art background, maybe it's the fact that I lived in a household filled w/ the ULTIMATE in indie-rocker subculture..but, I HIGLY doubt that loving your X-box (although personally I find playstation 2 to be better), wearing t-shirts from obscure bands, and never washing, is what a woman (like myself)looks for in a man in order to find someone whose "intelligent".
This pre-concieved notion falls under the mistaken beliefe that ANYONE can call themselves and artist and just because you ARE one, doesn't mean you are any closer to God or the knowledge of the Universe v.s. any other poor schmuck on Earth.
I'm a nerd-have been forever. Yes-I know who Rinoa is, I reference "Pheonix Down" in my discussions, I own every game system (as well as PC) imaginable, I have 12-sided die, and am very familiar w/ White Wolf's Vampire clans. I'm also an artist, Fine arts to be exact-in love w/ body studies, oils and watercolor and most other materials of creation, I have been formally trained and have struggled w/ myself and my art in every way. However, I don't fall into the pre-concieved vision of the "artistic type". I dress in high-end, form fitting clothes to accentuate the positive, I have hair the style of Victoria Secret's Angels, I wear high heels ALL.THE.TIME. I love make-up and do everything I can in order to make myself attractive while I've still got it.
I did the whole indie, punk rock, eclectic, wild artist thing already......in college..where it belongs.
Been there, done that.
A true artist would know when it's tme for them to advance and move on from the high school steriotyping that's managed to eek over into modern pop culture.
It's just all so boring now.

[Doctor X]

I love this idea. Even more because I know GGA would run it fairly and righteously.

I'd enter, and I know I could get others to enter it too.

[Brain From Arous]

I'd enter, but I wouldn't want to inflict images of myself upon the innocent.

We're talking retinal scarring here, folks...

[Andrew]

Man, Girls are complicated.

[Draigon]

Girls aren't complicated. They're just not "open source"

[Colin]

I don't think that a gaming contest should be required, because you don't have to be a good gamer to be a gamer. You would need to somehow find out how much of a gamer the contestant is. I don't know how this would be accomplished but I'm sure everyone could think up some criteria. I like a lot of the ideas so far though (espcially the topless tournement even though I don't think it should be the only criteria).

[girl_from_mars /// EveOfDusk]

Girls aren't complicated. They're just not "open source"

I want that as a t-shirt! Very nice, very nice indeed.
ANd i agree with Jane - boys that are into stuff are a big draw for me - tho i am not particular on what, just as long as they have a passion for *something* and dont get scared when a girl can hold up her end of the conversation.

[a_boy]

I can't believe you thought you could get away with sexist statements like that -- "boys are more visual" ... *pah* And I thought we had come a bit longer in gender thinking than that...

[Andrew]

It's not that sexist to say "boys are more visual"- there are certain sociological and biological realities that reflect innate differences between boys and girls. Statements like that are made "in general" anyways- there are always exceptions. I don't think saying "boys are more visual" makes it impossible or unacceptable for a boy not to be visually oriented.

[Andrew]

It's not that sexist to say "boys are more visual"- there are certain sociological and biological realities that reflect innate differences between boys and girls. Statements like that are made "in general" anyways- there are always exceptions. I don't think saying "boys are more visual" makes it impossible or unacceptable for a boy not to be visually oriented.

[Brain From Arous]

I suspect the problem is that after centuries of hearing, "Men and women are different, and by 'different' we mean that MEN ARE BETTER," a lot of people have taken to excess in the other direction by regarding the very idea of such differences as somehow malevolent.

Which gets silly, of course. "Sexist" is, if you think about it, a neutral adjective. For example, the whole medical speciality of OB/GYN is "sexist" as it pertains to females only (one might say the same thing about Urology).

Andrew is correct, though, in that there are confirmed differences between males and females - some of which go to basic brain function and structure. Child psychologists have observed these differences manifesting even in male and female infants.

I don't think it's a question of Boys vs Girls, one better and one worse... but we are not interchangable.